Guardian Angels

"Wherever you go and whatever you do may there always be an angel watching over you."

Everybody has lost someone.  Whether a grandparent, teacher, spouse, parent, brother, sister, friend, or just someone that you knew who changed your life for the better.  You always hear stories people tell after a loved one has passed where "they saw them," or "they felt them holding their hand."  Well, whether it be part of the grieving process, or God really letting you know that everything is going to be okay, I choose to believe that that split second of comfort you get when all other aspects of your life seems to be falling apart, is/are your Guardian Angel(s).  A friend told me that ever since her mother passed away that every time she goes on a road trip by herself she puts her "Guardian Angel" on the hood of her car to watch out for her.  Every time I see a yellow butterfly or a blue jay I can truly feel my dad's presence.  After my dad passed away my mom told me that whenever I got sad and didn't feel close to dad, to hold my hand out and imagine him holding it.  She told me this because one night when she was having a tough time, she nonchalantly let her hand hang off of the bed and all of a sudden she felt this comfort that was so strong she was no longer sad.  She felt something in her hand and came to the realization that she would be okay.  That little trick has helped me get through many sleepless nights.

Last night while at a banquet, the Delta was surrounded by tornado warnings and terrible weather.  Ever since I can remember I have been absolutely terrified of tornadoes.  I would freak out every time we would get potentially bad weather and each time Mom would quote her Grandaddy, "A storm will kill you but there's no use dying every time a cloud blows up."  Last night, when they were presenting us a Lifetime Achievement Award in honor of Mom, there were tornadoes all around us, but I didn't even hear it thunder.  I used to always worry where my loved ones would be if a tornado hit.  Last night I was with my brother, three out of four aunts, my Memommy, Ahyee and Mr. Doug, and Mrs. Jody and G-Dawg.  I had absolutely nothing to worry about.

I thank God every day for Guardian Angels.

About two weeks after Mom passed away I was staying the night at a friend's house, and almost every night I sleep with this smaller maroon down blanket that my Aunt Sissy got me when I was about 10.  It's usually at my feet or over my legs; very rarely will it be wrapped around me.  That was also around the time where I had to take medicine to be able to go to sleep at night.  It had been months since I had been able to sleep without any help, but unfortunately, that night there was nothing I could take.  I woke up for a split-second in the middle of the night with my blanket wrapped around me like a cocoon.  It felt like someone was holding me, loving on me, comforting me, just like Mom used to do.  I felt her instantly for just that split-second I was awake.  That was the best night's sleep I'd gotten in months.  

I thank God every day for Guardian Angels.


Song of the day:  Wild Angels-Martina McBride

"There's nothin' slow about me but my children."-Janine Earney

"I am not sure exactly what Heaven will be like, but I know that when we die and it comes time for God to judge us, he will NOT ask, 'How many good things have you done in your life,' rather he will ask, 'How much LOVE did you put into what you did?'"-Mother Teresa

In the past 64 years the West Memphis Chamber of Commerce has given four Lifetime Achievement Awards.  They gave the fourth one tonight at their annual banquet.  The well deserved person who received it?  You guessed it; the one and only Janine Buford Earney.  Words absolutely cannot explain the feeling I had when my brother and I were each presented with a plaque that says, "In Recognition of Her Countless Contributions to the Betterment of Our Community."  With a standing ovation, we proudly went up and received the award in honor of our Mom.  The humbling thing about it was that Mom could have cared less about any of this recognition she's been getting.  Don't get me wrong, she would have been so appreciative and humbled, but if I know one thing about my Mama it's that she wouldn't care if any one ever knew her name as long as she knew that she was helping somebody and bettering life for the people around her.  That's the kind of woman I want to be.  She didn't do her job because it made her look good, or because it helped her "climb the ladder."  She did her job because she LOVED doing it.  My parents always taught me that if I choose a job that I love then I will never have to work a day in my life.  If it makes you happy...

It is such a comforting feeling to know that others thought Mom was just as great as I thought she was.  There is nothing better than knowing that you have family, friends, and a community who will pick you up when you feel like you can't walk on your own.  So many people have wrapped their arms around me and comforted me when I truly needed it most, and I have my parents to thank for that.  Have you thanked God for everything he has done for you?  If you woke up tomorrow and were only left with the people/things you had expressed your thanks for, what would you have?

"That was rough.... Thing to do now is try and forget it.... I guess I don't quite mean that. It's not a thing you can forget. Maybe not even a thing you want to forget.... Life's like that sometimes... Now and then for no good reason a man can figure out, life will just haul off and knock him flat, slam him agin' the ground so hard it seems like all his insides is busted. But it's not all like that. A lot of it's mighty fine, and you can't afford to waste the good part frettin' about the bad. That makes it all bad.... Sure, I know - sayin' it's one thing and feelin' it's another. But I'll tell you a trick that's sometimes a big help. When you start lookin' around for something good to take the place of the bad, as a general rule you can find it."--Old Yeller

Song of the day:  "Little Miss"-Sugarland

You Are My Sunshine

When I was younger Ahyee, who has been my "babysitter" since I was two months old, used to sing this to me.  I can remember  her and my mom twirling me around and singing it over and over.  A good friend gave me a quote that I love:  "Recall as often as you wish; a happy memory never wears out."-Libby Fudim  It's amazing how big of a difference sunshine can make.  Yesterday in the Delta it was gloomy, cloudy, and pretty "blah" weather.  Today the sun is shining, birds are chirping, and there's not a cloud in the sky.  Every time there is a cloud-less day I think of my dad.  When I was 8 and we were in the Loire Valley in France I can so vividly remember looking up at the sky with him and him telling me just how much he loved days where the sky was so blue and beautiful, and there weren't any clouds to hide God's glory shining down.  I'm taking a shot in the dark and assuming that I'm not the only person who suffers from S.A.D., or Seasonal Affective Disorder.  You know, that terrible feeling you get when you go weeks and weeks without sunshine?  It usually comes up right after the excitement of the first snow in January or February.  You know, that day when you would give anything for a little Vitamin D.  Well, I've found an alternative that has been on my wish list for quite a while.  It's a "happy light" that provides artificial sunshine to lift up your mood!  (My birthday is March 24th) ;) Haha!

http://www.brookstone.com/happylight-6000-sunshine-supplement-light-system.html?his=2%7E46337%7E2%7Eroot_category%40kwd%7Esun+lamp&bkiid=searchResults|C4CategoryProdList1FDT|9373697

Brookstone may be onto something here.  Seriously though, how happier are people when it's sunny outside?  I'd pick 30 degrees and sunshine over 70 degrees and gloomy! How 'bout you?

"Got the sun shinin' on me like a big spotlight, so I know that everything's gonna be alright.. Ain't no tellin' where the wind might blow, free n easy down the road I go.."-Dierks Bentley "Free and Easy (Down the Road I Go)"


Song of the day:  Soak Up the Sun-Sheryl Crow

Everything Happens For a Reason

If you don't like something, change it.  If you can't change it, change the way you look at it.

Christmas 2008 my mom got me a silver leather bracelet that wraps around three times that says, "EVERYTHING HAPPENS FOR A REASON."  At least once a week somebody will ask me what my bracelet says and I'll say "My motto for life."  That bracelet hasn't left my arm since August, and now, more than ever, it has taken on a whole new meaning.  I'm still new to this whole "blogging" thing, but I look at it as therapy.  One thing that has really been on my mind, as well as heavy on my heart, are people who make excuses for everything.  I guess you could say it's my pet peeve.  Shit happens.  Love it or hate it, that's the way life is.  Bad things are going to happen.  Look beyond them and figure out how you can grow from them.  My mom used to always say, "If everyone were to put their troubles in a big pile, I bet you'd choose to have yours back instead of someone else's." 

"It is easier to light a candle than to curse the darkness."-Chinese Proverb; used by Adlai Stevenson at Eleanor Roosevelt's funeral

Enjoy today.  It's all you have.  Look back on a year ago.  Is life anywhere near how you thought it would be?  Probably not.  Good, bad, or indifferent, things happen every day that shape your life; and really, the only thing you can do is play the hand you were given.  You have to know, "which hands to shake, and which hands to hold."  Experiences make us who we are.

Song of the day:  "Anyway" by Martina McBride